The Tulip Heist

I think I'm just going to add commentary to my picture here. It sounds fun. This was taken a couple years ago at the Nixon Library in Yorba Linda. The sis is in the front doing the peace sign. Stereotypical to the people next to her, yes. That is why she did it. And yes, we are both going to Hell.

Moving on. I personally believe these people are discussing the purple tulips in their field of view. They are whispering however because they believe the woman behind them is a spy. You see, the peace sign is an international sign for 'spy.' (Look it up, and if you can't find it, don't panic. Remember, the international word for 'spy' is a long kept CIA secret therefore you won't be able to look it up.)

See, purple tulips are a rarity in the country where the man and woman come from. Purple tulips mean great fortune and money in this other country. They are worth more than gold and sell on the black market for hundreds more.
The large camera is actually a transport devise for tulip stems, seeds and stamens. (Why stamens? Because they can.) These people will then use the tulip parts and plant them making thousands more than the original parts they had. These people will be millionaires if all goes to plan.

I do believe the plan is for these two to pretend like tourists and when nobody is looking, take samples of the prized purple tulip. They will then continue to walk around the museum. All around are lookouts for these tulip takers. All the lookouts have large cameras and wear ridiculous polo shirts. Standard protocol. And the perfect getaway. Everyone gets into a large Mercades M Class and takes off onto the highway.

The perfect plan.

Random goals and a short story

Some random things I want to do in my lifetime.

Participate in an archeological dig.

Write a novel.

Visit each continent at least once.

Get my Masters. (the field is yet to be determined)

Learn to surf.

Go backpacking.

Stay at an incredibly fancy hotel and not worry about how much it costs.

Dye my hair blonde. (even if it's only for a week)

Drink afternoon tea in London while looking at Buckingham Palace.

Coach a volleyball team.

Go on an African safari.

Go to every Smithsonian museum in Washington D.C.

Participate in a game of cricket.

See a president be sworn in.

Learn to drive a stick.

They are indeed random, but oddly, equally important. I think another one should
say 'Get out of Yucca Valley (again)'.


And keeping with the complete randomness, a pic of NYC. It's me walking on the Brooklyn Bridge taking a pic of a couple of my friends (the two in black directly in front of me). The old dude to the left isn't one of them. Let's call him Bruce. All right, so Bruce took the afternoon off work at the stock exchange downtown to fetch some lunch. See, his thought process is that if he walks across the bridge, then he's worked off enough calories to enjoy a large slice of Brooklyn pizza. You go Bruce.

We won't judge you because of the shirt you're wearing. Okay, maybe we will. Hon, light blue doesn't go with your skin color. Tomorrow morning when you wake up, ask your wife which color looks best. Guaranteed she won't say light blue. And maybe you'll get that promotion you've been after at the exchange.

Or maybe, you'll just eat your pizza, take the subway to your tiny apartment and open your closet to only reveal light blue shirts. Hey, we all can't be perfect.